Monday, July 27, 2009

Déjà vu



So, here's the post you've probably been waiting for. Long but I had a lot too say.

SexyJamaican has a girlfriend--again.

After that Halloween party where we reunited again we were "cool"

>>FF 6 months

I graduated. He graduated and came home. Didn't really know where things were going but it was fun to have him around. After all the fuckery between us we still tolerated eachother and were pretty good friends. We were hangin out..chillin..having sex here and there....(everywhere). I started wondering when things would switch up. I got the answer last month. I notice he's acting funny on me. I start seeing some chick pop up on his FB, his status' are suspect, and I put the pieces together. So instead of being quiet about it like last time, I speak up and ask him if he's seeing/dating/fucking anybody else. The answer to all three--NO.(with a straight face yall). He say's that he's not ready for a relationship..he's focused on his career..blah blah bullshit..and the reason he pulled away is that he saw me falling for him again. I half-heartedly believe this. My Woman's Intuition is telling me theres more to this story, and that bitch NEVER lies. A couple weeks later he gets a new job and has to relocate out of state. So like the lil investigator I am..I do some searching and find out the girl leaving messages on his FB has her heart set on relocating with him (along with some other tidbits that would make an unstable woman slash a tire or two) The man would be a pretty good liar if he only kept his shit off the internet (stupid). I confront him again (not with all the facts..just general shit). Again-he lies to me. Instead of breaking out the evidence on his ass, I pretend to believe him. Made his ass dance like Bojangles with all the lies and stories he conconcted to cover his ass.

I did this up until the day before he left. He noticed when I stopped looking him in the eye. I guess his guilty conscience kicked him in the ass and he tried to show me love he should've been showing: smiled at me more, tried to make me laugh, hug me, forehead kiss me *sigh*. Shit, i'll admit it..We even had goodbye sex (protected). I guess I just wanted to validate too myself how much of a liar he was (and get some peen in the process.Don't judge me!). The day he finally left I got sick of hurting and decided to end it. I texted him and told him that I couldn't talk to him anymore and that he knew why.

My ass was heartbroken again..chest all heavy, felt like I couldn't breathe, sleep, didn't eat, lost weight, cried, walked around like a fucking zombie for a few weeks. Hurt. Hurt. Hurt.

In a way, I feel like this is all my fault. I felt stupid for knowing what the man was capable of and still allowing myself to fall into his trap. How's that saying go?: "Fool me once shame on you..fool me twice....(you know the rest)" But you know what? That's life. Most importantly, it's MY life. I lived and learned. No one can tell you shit when you're in a situation like that; not even yourself. After it happened, I didn't tell my friends because I felt like they would say.."Oh well, you shoulda known blah blah blah" and that's the last thing I wanted to hear! I haven't talked to him in a couple weeks and that's how I want to keep it. Don't know if ole girl moved with him and don't care. He wants a stupid girl and she doesn't seem like the sharpest butterknife in the drawer. He's always gonna be a playin ass player. Just not with me. Anymore.


CHILE PLEASE- Speak on it.

Monday, July 13, 2009

Liar.


There is nothing I detest more in this world than a stone cold liar. Give me 1000 yeast infections and it wouldn't irritate me more than being lied to. To my fucking face.

If you're gonna lie be a good one and keep your shit off the internet. It's 2009 and anyone can find out anything. Sick of duplictous ass mofos who don't realize the hole they've dug has already caved in on their ass.

10 Reasons you should just tell the TRUTH--Liar!

1. I'm gonna find out anyway
2. It's stupid.
3. You make yourself look stupid
4. I'm gonna find out anyway dumbass
5. I'm gonna find out anyway stupid dumbass
6. I'm gonna find out anyway jerkface
7. I'm gonna find out anyway punk ass
8. I'm gonna find out anyway idiot
9. I'm gonna find out anyway skunt bucket
10. I'm gonna find out anyway you LIAR!

So g'head. Do what you do, but if you can't keep it 100 w/folk then you probably shouldn't be doing stupid shit that you have to lie about in the first dayum place.

I'm Sick of this boy/girl shit. Men lie. Women lie to themselves. The shit is stupid. At the moment, I can sincerely say that I do NOT believe in romantic love. Relationships are built on a bed of lies covered with soft satin sheets.


CHILE PLEASE!-
I'd rather sleep on the cold hard floor.

Saturday, July 4, 2009

Ms. Lovely is a Registered Nurse!!

It is official. Yes, Ms. Lovely is alive and well. I took a hiatus from blogging because I was studying for my NCLEX (and going through some major fuckery which I will explain later). I took my test Thursday..I was the last one to get registered and the 1st to leave with 75Q. If any of my readers are nurses they know that 75 can be a good or bad thing. Couldn't sleep last night thinking about my results. I logged on today and paid the 8 bucks for the 48hr results and there it was "Pass." A nurse..RN, BSN motheruffas!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm so hype right now. Only if you knew what I have been going through for the last 2 weeks (again, will explain next post..)

I feel like nothing can hold me back now! By September I should have a new car, apt, and sense of accomplishment I have never felt before. I am through with the bullshit ass men, liars, cheaters, fake ass friends, and skank bishes who try to bring me down with their words and actions. From now on it's all about ME, ME, ME, ME,ME...forget about YOU, YOU, YOU, YOU, YOU...lol..

Today will be a good day. I am going out with one of my classmates and then to a friend's BBQ to celebrate proper with major fuckery to ensue!

CHILE PLEASE!- “I love to see a young girl go out and grab the world by the lapels. Life's a bitch. You've got to go out and kick ass"--M. Angelou **KICKING ASS!**