Saturday, September 27, 2008

How was my weekend?

Me, Smiley & Candy went out to Dave & Busters this past weekend. Smiley had broken up with her b/f a few weeks ago and Candy had broken up with hers that day so it was certified a 'Fuck em' girl, fuck em' party. I was in rare form, cussin out corny ass white boys and just acting like a certified blackard..smh. I can usually hold my liquor, but I didn't eat beforehand and ended up urling in Candy's car..OMG, I felt so bad :(

Absolut(ely NO Men!)

*deleted*

We made a toast/promise to ourselves. Mine was to not bust the windows out of Chocolate's car LOL. (lies!)
No comment.
*deleted*

that's better..Smiley kicking over traffic cones.."Fuck that, if we can't park here now EVERYBODY can!"
*deleted*

Fin!

*deleted*

CHILE PLEASE
- I needed that!

Tuesday, September 23, 2008

The Funeral

So I went to the funeral last Tuesday and needless to say I was nervous, anxious, and all those feelings that make your stomach sour. The night before i'd tried to figure out something to wear. My mom told me wearing all black was cliche' and I didn't have a decent top to go with my black slacks other than a black top..So I got up early to go to ghetto mecca of clothing: Rainbow. They opened at 10 and the funeral started at 11. So I get there at 10:01 and the heffa that opens the store refused to open the door because she was putting up baby clothes. WTF?! 3 other customers as pissed as me were ready to commence cussing her ass out until she finally decided to open the store at freaking 10:20. I swear this is one of the reasons I hate living in the ghetto. Straight ig'nance and blackardry!

Now when I got to the funeral home I saw all my aunt's and uncles..cousins standing outside. No sign of my dad. It was so weird since I haven't seen any of them in over 10 years let alone together. They don't necessarily get along...When me and my mom got out the car my aunt Betty who I haven't seen in over 10 years said "Here come the twins..." I looked just like my mom when she was young. Skinny with big boobs lol.

I gave everybody a hug and a kiss

My grandmother looked nice..At peace--finally.

My dad finally came and sat down next to me. He held my hand and I immediately started crying. I was so trying soooo hard not to cry but they just came and wouldn't stop. No matter how much I lose contact with my dad I still love him. You know when you're a kid you think your dad is Superman and nothing can hurt him. At that moment I knew he was hurting. And I realized my Superman is only human.

We went to the burial and later a get together at my uncles house. It was like a family reunion even though everyone didn't come. The food was delicious and my greedy butt had 3+ plates. OMG my cousins, we all look exactly alike! Same size, shape, same lack of booty LOL. My twin cousin made some super-duper strong strawberry daquiri's. When my dad found out I was drinking he tried to get all daddy like "Oh NO, my baby can't be drinking. She gotta drive!" He ended up telling my mom that he still loved her with his new girlfriend sitting 20ft away LOL! Then, we looked at some old pictures of our parents wearing crooked afro's and polyester suits. Our parents used to be havin' it back in the day! At the end of the night we all exchanged numbers. Everything turned out so much better than I thought it would.

*sigh*

CHILE PLEASE--Hopefully the next time we get together won't be the result of a funeral.

Saturday, September 20, 2008

Friday Fuckery

  • Thank the teenage jeebus! My week is over! Hope all my lovely readers had a good week :)

  • Ok so, The funeral was Tuesday and it went well (well not well...but as far as the awkwardness goes...) I'll tell you all about it cause its a long story.
  • My psych rotation is hilarious as I thought it would be. Picture a patient telling me I had big tits..lmao! (will elaborate on that as well)
  • I didn't forgot about the honest blogger award and I will be getting to my blog rounds within the next couple days. I miss yall soooo much, but a chick be busy :(
  • I've finally decided what to do to my nappy head so I'm braiding my hair in micros tomorrow. I finally have a desire to go out, party, drank and skank it up for a change (jackin KB's slang). I have denied myself far too long. Not to toot my horn but uhhh..TOOT TOOT! A bitch like me is too fly to be cooped up in the crib! Yahmeeeeeeeaaannnn?!

CHILE PLEASE
-- I know yall get tired of logging on and seeing these half-assed posts but I-i-i's gettin to it!

Sunday, September 14, 2008

Sunday Kinda Love

So this weekend I was 'sposed to go out with my roomates. Here was the plan

Friday night: party in Philly.
Saturday: Temple U. Step Show

I went to neither. It's not that I didn't want to, but I simply am not up to par at the moment. Reasons being:

1.My hair is a stone cold mess. My bumpers (ghetto slang for flat irons) broke so i've been wrapping my hair for 2 weeks straight. It's pretty long but I like to be fab when I go out. No questions asked. If my hair is not done I don't feel right.

2. I can't buy a new pair of bumpers because i'm broke. Well, not completely. I did sew-in's for 2 of my roomates and micros for another friend. But that's gas money...shoot. When I like to go out I like to have $$$ to buy my own damn amaretto sours instead of having some dude babysitting me cause he copped me a drank.

3. I feel to old to party "in da club." I don't know if you guys realize this but i'm (now don't go telling nobody..) *looks around* 24 years old. Even though i could easily pass for a 17 year old, it doesn't mean I wanna dance to "She Gotta Donk." Shoot, I didn't even go to 18 & up clubs when I was 18 so why the heck would I wanna go when i'm *shhhhhh* 24

4. I didn't go to the stepshow because SexyJamaican is a Kappa and pretty much goes to every freaking greek event, and most likely participated (I heard they won). Maaaaan, I haven't seen him since that fuckery went down and I don't know how i'd react if I saw him, so lately i've been avoiding all things greek.

...Yea I got more excuses than a nilla going to jail but it is what it is...

What I did instead...
Friday night I slept
Saturday...I went over my grandmoms house. I like being around my family. My cousins have a bunch of kids and they all look like mini-me's. Its so funny and they're so effin cute. Me and LadyG are the only ones who don't have chirrens yet..
Today I went to my grandmoms house again..My aunt's BDay is tomorrow and her daughter (my cuz) cooked some baked chicken, fried fish, cornbread, rice, and stuffing! Don't forget the icecream & cake. You know I never miss out on a meal so I was there grubbin with my skinny self. On the way home (2 hours ago) I started crying out of nowhere. It was weird. A love song came on and that just made me realize that I don't have anyone calling my phone asking me how my day was. I feel like something is wrong with me since dudes keep doing me wrong..Where's my Sunday love? The kind that Etta sings about..*sigh*

Ok..on a more serious matter

My grandmother on my father's side passed away. I was not close with her and for the longest I can remember she wasn't mentally stable (Alzheimers I believe). She died in a nursing home and from what I hear she was suffering so she is in a better place now. I haven't cried. But how am I supposed to feign grief? I feel more guilty than anything because I didn't get to know her. *sigh* And wouldn't you know that my father lives on the same block as my college and hasn't called me at all?..He has my number but only seems to pull it out his memory when he needs something. I called and left a message on his phone but--nothing. You'd think he didn't have a daughter (his only child..but that a whole 'notha post). The funeral is Tuesday. I'm going.
I really have to mentally prepare myself for this family reunion. Boy, this is going to be awkward.

CHILE PLEASE
- Gearing up for another week. Sunday.......Sunday come soon...

Thursday, September 11, 2008

Squeezing it in..


blogging that is. But ain't some delicious lookin' orange juice?

The truth is i've been reading like crazy. Reading 5-6 chapters per lecture. Ridiculous! I don't know how the eff they expect us to read all this mess. I'm certainly no speed reader and my attention span has shrunk to the equivalence of a two year old after a pack of M&M's. Your lovely one is just getting back into the swing of things with school and haven't been able to comment like I want too (even on my blog..sorry yall) I plan on squeezing a good 2 hours in my schedule Sunday to catch up 'cause I def miss my blog fam. Just a few things..

I started my psych rotation and it's been going pretty good. I sat in on a outpatient adolescent session and some of these kids are a mess. As soon as one kid sat down he pulled out a lighter he picked up off the ground.WTF!? Most of them were probably spoiled brats whose parents told them "NO" for the first time. But other kids were sincerely effed up. Like Suicide Girl, she tried to kill herself by slitting her wrists because she said she felt like no one cared. Damn, and she was a little black girl which made my heart bleed even more for her...*sigh* Then I sat in on an adult session that was something like an AA meeting. I love the candor of people with addictions so i'm definitely thinking about looking further into it.

I've been eating like crazy. This campus food must have crack sprinkled on top of it because I can not stop eating! The other day I freaking rib eye steak for lunch and got mad when I realized they had a taco bar I missed out on. Greedy! I'm only 115lbs but ya girl might be squeezing into some jeans before this semester is over lmao.

Ok, enough with school..

There's been no men in my life. Well, I guess BabyBoy counts. He lives on campus and I know his ass couldn't wait till I got here. I saw him yesterday before my class and he told me he finally got a car. I joked with him that he could take me back to Applebees so I could get him back for the stunt he pulled. You see, the last time we went he told the folk it was my birthday (it wasn't) and they came out clapping and singing with a big ole chocolate cake thingamajig. So embarrassing! (how cute of him though:) Anywho, my roomate Smiley told me he had a girlfriend so I asked him just to confirm; to which he responded "Something like that..yea theres something going on..."

Translation: Yea I have a girlfriend but I want my cake, pie, icecream and eat it too. Preferably off of your naked body..
Yea, he's a sweetie but even sweeties can be sweet little dogs. I told him I couldn't come between him and that chick. Da eff I look like getting in some silly college drama?! Chile Please! and NO thank you. He texted me later that night to ask what I was doing. He gots no reply from me. I'm keepin it friendly from this point on.

Ok, i'm getting ready for bed now. Gonna cuddle up with my pink body pillow, & love-a-lot bear (lol) Got a full day of lecture then clinical, then my roomies wanna drag me to a party right after. Sigh. Pray for me yall..

CHILE PLEASE--Love-a-lot bear can't hug me back. Where is my man? :(

Tuesday, September 9, 2008

BlackMon go away. Don't come back another day!

So lets get straight to it..

This past Sun I went to pay mom a visit. When I got back to my apartment she called and asked if I knew someone named "Aaron". Apparently some dude came to the door and asked for me by name. Hmmm. "No, I don't know anyone named Aaron offhand, let me get back to you.." So I thought about it and it finally hit me. BlackMon has a friend by that name. I think it's Adrian, or Arian..or something similar. Anywho I asked my brother what the dude looked like and it was a match. This motherfucker has ppl knocking on my door for me! He doesn't even have the balls to do it himself because my mom would probably call the cops on his bum ass. I haven't talked to him since this. He probably just got out of jail or something. After knowing him for 10 years i'm 100% sure this is an attempt to see me or rekindle some shit that died out years ago. I swear ass is more unstable than a schizophrenic off his meds with two broken legs. The semester just started and I do NOT want to deal with his ass. He knows what college I go and I pray he doesn't see my car. *sigh*

CHILE PLEASE--I wish I never met him..

Saturday, September 6, 2008

Stalkers and WacArnolds

Classes started this week for me and I haven't really felt any two ways about it. On one hand this is probably one of the hardest of the 4 semesters required for nursing school but I.Got.This! At the beginning of each semester we have to take this med-calc quiz in order to stay in the program which always scares me a bit but I ended up passing on the first try! Like I said. I. Got. This!

So, sitting in my room sometimes can be a drag. I'm happy that I have the space but I get so lonely when my roomates have company over :( I want somebody to hold onto at night ya know? And not any of these baby boys on campus smh..

Speaking of which: I met this guy, we'll call him SmartGuy. He's a transfer student so being the doll that I am I showed him around campus. Gave him my number (why o why did I do that??!!) He started telling me how he wanted to move on campus yadda yadda and wanted to know how the apartment layout.

Scruuruuuuruuuuuuuurrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr. In man words: I want to see your room, your bed, and eventually the innermost softness your poom poom.

NO! So I stopped replying to his text messages, phone calls after about 2 days. The other night don't you know this fool sent me a half nekkid pic of him. Ummm. Creepy. The next day I saw him in the cafe and told him not to send me shit like that. His corny ass tried to say he meant to send it to someone else. I told him to stop lying because that shit was creepy and I didn't appreciate it. What kind of slutbagwhoreskank do you think I am? Did you think you'd get a snapshot of the mammaries in return? The luscious poom poom perhaps? Dog, uno yaself! He apologized and told me it wouldn't happen again but that shit is a wrap. He texted me a few more times with some ole reverse psychology "Oh you not replying cause you're so busy..that's wsup..means you're a go-getter." Nah, son..I'm not replying cause yousa damn stalker! I'm so done it's not even funny. He had some potential but naw B..I can't fuck with stalkers.

What else...

Yesterday I had a full day. Lecture in the A.M and clinical in the P.M. Nursing from sun up to sun down. By the time I got back the cafe was closed so I figured i'd go to McDizzles and rack up on the dollar menu (cause a sis is broke). Anywho, I get there and it's maybe 3 cars in front of me (not too bad) and wait for at least 5 mins before some hoodrat hops on the mic. Mind you this is the ghetto and blackardry is to be expected.

"Can I take your order?"
"Yea, let me get a McChicken sandwich and a medium fry"
"We aint' got McChicken"
"Ummm..wtf? Ok, hold on one sec *figuring out what I want*"
"OK..let me get a double cheeseburger and medium fry"
*silence for another 3 mins*
*Ms. Lovely gets pissed*
"Helloooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!wtf!"
"I can't hear you"

No cars were moving and at this point I was so hungry that I just pulled off. When I got around to the side door the cops were there and some blackards were fussin and cussin about their order. Apparently the reason why the drive thru wasn't moving. I haaaaaaaaate living in the ghetto! I have the worst experiences with fast food. A few years ago on my old blog I talked about the WacArnolds incident, and I even had problems at Wendy's. I stormed back to my room mad and hungry. SJ's brother and his friend were up from VA for the weekend. They were headed to some party and even though I really didn't feel like entertaining company I let them come up and bring me food and ack-a-hol. Watched some Conan O'Brien and took my punk ass to bed. That was my week this far. I haven't gotten to my blog rounds but i'll check yall out eventually..

CHILE PLEASE- I'm chillin like a villian..

Tuesday, September 2, 2008

All settled..

Well almost. Still have a few things to unpack. I moved in Saturday/Sunday. My mom helped me with most of the heavy lifting. When it was all said and done mom looked like she was ready to cry (mind you i'm only 15 mins away)..But i'm her baby so that's to be expected with me leaving the nest. I had to re-assure her that her lovely one would fare just fine. She took me out and brought me a bunch of stuff at Target (best store EVAR!) I went home for Labor Day and chilled with my cousin who you all know as FunnyGirl, but will get to know as LadyG because I helped her set up her first blog! It's called Eat My Cookiez (props for the banner go to moi:) Go support and get yourself some of those good cookies before she runs out! She made an attempt at whipping up some Curry Chicken, beans and rice and it was scrump-diddly-umptious! I swung past my moms house and she had some ribs & greens waiting for me. Lawd they tryna fatten me up yall!
If feels so good to live on my own. I have 3 roomates and I think we'll all get along well:

Smiley- She's a sweetheart. After I unpacked my stuff she knocked on my door and asked if I wanted to go over the bridge to Philly and walk around the city. I was too tired so we ended up having a few drinks and watching the STD festivities aka "I Love Money" and getting to know eachother..Goodtimes!
Note to self: Although you can handle your drank DO NOT mix light and dark EVER again!..My head was spinning like the exorcist.

Candy- She's one of the only other black girls and in my program and one of the reasons I moved down here in the first place. We can study together and just wild out! Love that girl...

Mystery- The reason I call her mystery is because I just met her this morning after being her for almost a week. We tried to get another girl as our roomate but Mystery said she wasn't moving. I felt a little bad that we were tryna oust her already but it is what it is. Anywho, Smiley and Candy said she stays to herself. I knocked on her door last night to introduce myself and be friendly but she didn't answer. Okkkaaaay. Then this morning I was brushing my teeth and she stuck her head out the door and said "Hi". Idk..maybe she's going through some thangs but then again i'd keep to myself if nobody wanted me there in the first place.

Ok, I think that's all for today. I'm waiting for LadyG to come see my apartment cause lawd knows I need company. I get all lonely waiting for my roommates to get out of class. All i've been doing is eating, sleeping, eating, and eating...lol. I start class tomorrow so i'm gonna



CHILE PLEASE
- Let the late night study session begin!

Monday, September 1, 2008

Pass The Love


Ok, so the always lovely Eb listed me as one of her favorite blogs. So here is my list of blogs that I

Rules are:
1. The winner can put the logo on his/her blog.
2. Link the person you received your award from.
3. Nominate 7 other blogs.
4. Put links of those blogs on yours.
5. Leave a message on the blogs of the people you’ve nominated

1. So Much Drama In The LBC
Like most blogs I stumbled across his after he left a comment. Now when I logged on his blog wasn't all fancy smancy and he isn't big on puncuation but then I started reading and could not stop. His posts are hilarious! Point blank. Whether its him talking about his sister's Ginuwine lookin' ass boyfriend or just something totally random, I can always relate to all of his stories in one way or another. You should too...

2)
B (Rantings of a Rebella)
I consider her my long lost telepathic e-sis because her posts sometimes mirror my thoughts to a TEE. Not to mention she also shows my inept make-up wearing self how to get fly on her other blog
Clumps of Mascara

3)
Deja (Cool Glass of Dejanade)
Ok, She cracks me the hell up..I love the randomosity of her posts; especially when she talks about random dudes and old ass white men tryna holla, not to mention the girl has a
fierce ass wardrobe.

4)
Karrie B
Ok, she makes my social life look like wack juice and her pic posts are the best. I love her fashion sense and her tell-you-to-your-face attitude. I would love to hang out with her and do all types of hood rat stuff. Plus anyone who says things like "baby whores" is cool with me..

5)
E (Eclectik-Relaxation)
I ran across his blog not too long ago and I was thinking "who is this bald-head man??" So I read....and read.....and read. His posts are so random and I love it. Plus his music taste is the shiiiiiii (despite the LL/top 5 debate lol). His outlook on
us women is funny. Pluuuus, he has a messageboard. He's like my boyfriend in my head.

6)
A.M (A.M. In Every Day)
Omg, I had the sad face on for a second cause I thought she deleted her blog. Come to find out she changed her url so update your blogrolls ppl. Ok on with the mushiness..Lovely chick and a seems like a down to earth college girl. Plus shes local (and I get all excited when I see a close bloggette lol).

7) One Man's Opinion (Look At This Nigger)
Ok, the title alone had me cracking the hell up from jump. His cop stories are hilarious and it's nice to get his perspective on things as well as pointing out the blackerdry* that goes on with our people.


*The Blackards(blackardry, blackerdom)- My made up word for those "N" words

Now if I didn't list you please wipe that frown off your face because I love all my blog fam!