Wednesday, June 25, 2008

You got a WHAT?!


A boyfriend?!..

Yes, Ms. Lovely officially has a boyfriend. So much for keeping those options open eh? Grab the popcorn.

Remember I was telling yall about Chocolate? Well, we went out on a few more dates..spent a little more time together. First was Olive Garden because neither of us had been and I had a craving for lasagna. Chile please! I'm never going there again. First off our Sprite tasted like water'd down seltzer water, Chocolate's utensils were dirty, they gave him fried potatoes instead of mashed potatoes..Ugh just a hot mess! He took me to shoot some pool at a little chill spot.. Ms. Lovely grew up with a pool table in the basement so I know a lil shum'n shum'n. We had so much fun that night despite the fuckery at OG. Our next date was a little more low key. I had a craving for funnel cake so I took him to this little black owned ice cream shop (fucka Rita's) that makes them. It was so cute, the two of us with more white powder on our lips that Amy Crackhouse and Tyrone Biggums combined. Later I took him to meet some of my loud ass family members. My aunt walks in the house and recognizes him from the gym where she works out. My poor baby just put his head down in shame. The look on his face: PRICELESS! You see, my aunt is pretty much the flyest 40something you ever did see, so the young boys always try to get at her. We had a good laugh about it but she pulled me aside and told me that he was a good guy..*smile*

Last weekend we were watching t.v at his house and discussing what each of us were looking for. Both of us wanted relationships and we mutually agreed to find that relationship with eachother. And just like that I had a boyfriend. I changed my status' to "In A Relationship" but something was still nagging at me. At first I was thinking that things were moving too fast. Second, I felt as if I was gonna miss out on something..like my playette card was being revoked. I was doubting my decision yall. Especially after 30349394 phone calls from folk demanding to know when I had decided to make a personal decision about my love life that has absolutely nothing to do with them. Even before I changed my status' on facebook and myspace I decided to call one guy in particular because I knew he was really feeling me (even though I hadn't seen him in months and never did anything remotely sexual with him). He's a nice guy, a little immature; but the bottom line is that he just wasn't my type. I don't know about yall but if the sexual attraction isn't there..aint nathan poppin off. Also, I know what it is to have my heart crushed from a random status update *coughsexyjamaicansneeze* so i decided to let him know beforehand....

So I call and tell him the news. Understandably, he was a little hurt. He said he would call me back after he took a shower..Chile please, I bet he cried in that shower..I felt sooo bad yall. I was hurt for him. And that only lasted until the next morning when I received a text message from him talm'bout:

"Yo Ms. Lovely got a b/f and told me she think of me as a good friend. She put me in the friend zone dog!"
So i'm lookin at that shit like "hunh?..wtf?"...5 minutes later he texted me again talm'bout..
"My bad, I didn't mean to send that 2 u..."

Chile please!!! I didn't respond. That is the oldest trick in the book, not to mention..How old are we again? Like I said he is immature. I still feel a little bad. I pray that he can get over it..

Anyway, back to my decision..

I discussed it with my close cousin FunnyGirl and I came to the conclusion of "Fuck it, i'm gonna do what makes me happy. And Chocolate most definitely makes me happy. I'm living in the moment and taking things day by day. If it works out--great. If it doesn't--at least we tried. I refuse to keep my heart locked away surrounded by animosity because of what the last man..err..little ass boy did. I'm taking a big chance here but it's worth it. Shoot..thinking back to all the nights i've been unhappy, miserable, and no doubt crying myself to sleep; where in the blue hell were these same folk who are now demanding answers about my changed status?!?Nowhere; that's where. 75% of them didn't give a damn enough to show interest or throw their hat in the ring. Now all of a sudden i'm taken, folk wanna be in a tremendous uproar. Chile please! The other 25% are concerned loved ones that want to make sure I don't get my heart broken again. I understand their concern and love for me and I definitely take their advice to heart. Yet and still I am my own woman.

Sex...

I'm definitely waiting to make sexytimes with him. We kiss (a lot) and sometimes I get in the habit of sucking on his neck and whatnot. Just being a good ole' fashioned tease. Last night he got me back. We were watching the BET awards and he had me ready to committ 1st degree rape on his ass. Had me about to take his ass down like Ciara did Chris Brown. I think it's safe to say I found that sex drive I was looking for a few weeks ago LOL! We decided to wait. I told him I want it to be "special" and he agreed.

Chile Please- How did you get here..nobody's sposed to be here? You know what? It doesn't matter because I want you to be near...

Wednesday, June 11, 2008

Where is my sex drive?!



If anyone has seen it my kitty would sure like it back. For the last 2mths I haven't so much as grazed my clitoris unless it involved a shower. That might be a stretch (maybe 3-4 times) but that's nothing compared to how high it used to be. Since that drama with SJ I just haven't been willing to let myself feel 'that way.' Most in part because I usually think about my most frequent partner; and I don't want to think about his triflin ass!!

The older I get the more I feel like sex has to be with someone I genuinely trust and love. I cannot say that will be soon at all. I haven't had a lot of sex parters, but with each one I feel like they took pieces with them. Blackmon took my love, SJ stole my trust, the rest just took what they could. In the end, here I am--left to patch up the damage. All because of some dick. Albeit good dick but that's the damn problem. I hate being a victim of dickmatizim. Although dick isn't the only thing that attracted me to these men..the dick is what exacerbated my feelings for them.

Besides, once you have sex with someone, you open yourself up to being vulnerable, hurt, and making more out of the situation that what it really is. I don't think I can open up (pun intended) to anyone like that right now. Ms. Lovely is about as vulnerable as a newborn kitten in a jungle with a hurricane over the horizon. It just ain't happenin'..The next man I consider letting close to my heart is going to have to put in a LOT of work to win me over this time. Until then I think i'll just invest in a vibrator..Ladies please put me on..

CHILE PLEASE--I got this icebox where my heart used to be...and i'm hoping someone could thaw it for me..

Also..I authorized 'Anonymous' users to comment(didn't realize it was off)..so all you lurkers go head and put your 2cents in :)

Sunday, June 8, 2008

Finally. Some good news.

I was looking through my recent posts and all of them reek of gloom and sorrow. But hey, that's the mood I was in. Things have been looking up these past couple weeks and here's some reason's why.

1. I got called in for an interview for a nurse externship at a prestigious hospital that I orignally applied too. When I called a few months ago they said they didn't have any positions but will keep my application on file (yadda yadda..the usual). Last week mom woke me up out of a drunken party stupor and said I had a message on the home phone (Chile Please--I don't remember the last time I used the home phone, let alone check the messages!). I went to the interview Monday and knocked that ish out the park. They loved me but we all remember what happened last time. I've been trying not too get my hopes too high but I just have a good feeling about this one.

2. I've been having so much FUN!!!!

Even though the situation w/SJ had me feeling down and out I still haven't called and I simply don't care anymore. I've come to terms that he is just a selfish asshole and that, that young lady is in for a rude awakening. Better her than me. So in celebration of the single life me and my girls have been partying it up. Last week we even met Ne-Yo (I swear i'll never say anything bad about the man cause he was a sweetheart :)

Anywho, in random news, I auditioned for a dating show on MTV. Yea funny right. I had not planned on auditioning; I was just moral support on the trip to NYC for my cousin; but once we got there the casting director asked if I wanted to audition as well. It was hilarious. We're still waiting to hear something back. If I get it look forward to seeing Ms.Lovely make an absolute fool of herself on national television lmao.

3. I have a new friend.

Last week my homegirl Krittle, who i've known since 5th grade hooked me up on a blind date. I know what you're thinking. "With the innanets and myspace and facebook and stuff who in the heezy-hell goes on blind dates these days??!"..Well apparently Ms. Lovely does. Krittle called and asked permission to give him my number. And you know ya girl will give anything a try once so I said go'head. We'll call him "Chocolate"..Chocolate calls me and we bust it up on the phone for a few days. He decided to get my bored butt out of the house and asked if I wanted to go to the movies. I got there a 1/2 hour before the movie started so I can have a 1up on the looks. You see, when Krittle says a guy is cute I usually have to do a double, sometimes triple take. When Chocolate got out his car my eyes would NOT move away from him. He is aesthetically beautiful, well built, well spoken, and well mannered. I decided to see "The Strangers" so I could be all jumpy and girly next to him. We had a good time though it was a little awkward. Nope, No kissy kiss on the first date. I've learned from my mistakes so i'm taking things slow. Most importantly, i'm keeping my options open this time..

Last I would like to say I appreciate all your comments! Sometimes I reply and sometimes I don't(I can be a lazy girl) but I DO read them :)

CHILE PLEASE- "I'm too fly to be depressed"-Ne-Yo